<...> insert missing words

Before I came to live in a small place I was a bit concerned that everybody would know everything about me, then I realised that's only a problem if you have something to hide, which I don't, so my concerns were laid to rest.

It's been interesting over the years to hear back snippets of information about myself which have done the rounds of the grape vine before finally finding their way back home. I've come to the conclusion that people simply don't listen, or rather they hear but don't listen and that causes problems. If you hear something but don't listen there are gaps in what you know, and gaps have to be filled if you want what you know to make sense.

The latest round of "fill-in the missing words" has been about me working at the school for the last month. I had to tell everybody what I was doing and why because the temporary job interfered with my other job and I wanted the least amount of disruption to clients as possible. Within days I started getting panic calls from clients asking if it was true I'd folded my small business and was now working full-time at school. Somebody stopped me on the street and congratulated me on my new job teaching I.T. at school. "NOOOO!" I sighed, "I'm the temporary paper-clip monitor" and explained the situation again. (I wonder if this gem originated with the hags because on more than one occasion I parked the car close to where they have their hag fest and heard mention of "computer" as I carried a laptop bag from the car.) Anyway, I then received a call from a client asking me where in Gibraltar I was working because he was about to take his lunch break and would pop over for a quick haircut. What? "No, I'm not in Gibraltar, I'm in Pleasantville and I'm the temporary paper-clip monitor" I repeated again. Then there was the call asking me how easy it was to get my new job as Head of I.T. at school. I was tempted to say it was REALLY easy because it was an imaginary job and hey, if we all listen to Willy Wonker (or was it Judy Garland?) if we wish hard enough anything can come true. But no, I explained AGAIN that it was temporary and a lowly paper-clip monitor.

I finished at school last week and smiled to myself when I thought of all those people who didn't listen and filled in the gaps. Over dinner last night P mentioned somebody at school had sent me an email on my school email account, not realising I'd finished. So in case it was something important I opened that account for the first time since I'd finished and found the in-box full of emails saying "I didn't realise you were only temporary..."



Nurse, I'm ready for my medication!