I didn't do French, I did woodwork. S said he had a smattering of French, but not enough to understand what was going on. P said he did O' level French twice (we sighed), but he failed it both times. K said nothing but slowly shook her head. We'd all assumed that one of the others would be able to communicate on our behalf, or that a mix of Spanish and English would work. We were wrong.
We were stood in a strange (but beautiful) house which we'd rented for the weekend in Morocco. In front of us stood a woman who was clearly very friendly and welcoming, glad to see us, mid way through cooking our dinner and trying to get something across in a language none of us understood. Bugger!
We were using Spanish and English and she was using French and Arabic, but her husband spoke some Spanish so he was called in to help. It went something like this:
Simo: My wife she cooks your food, yes?
Us: Ahh, yes.
Simo: But she needs deen...no, one moment, she wants you to understand about dee, deener. Now, yes, if it's possible?
Us: Ohhhhh, she wants to show us what she's cooking. (We go into the kitchen, followed by Simo and his wife, who are talking together in rapid Arabic.)
Us: Hhmmm it smells wonderful.
Simo: No.
Us: No?
Simo: No, you don't understand. The deener for food, yes?
Us: Yes.
Simo: No. You pay for house, yes?
Us: Yes.
Simo: And the deener food is from us.
Me: Wow, thank you so much. That is so kind of you...(to the others) Dinner is on the house.
(We all smiled a lot, shook their hands and thanked them, but they just looked confused.)
Simo: (Muttering in Arabic takes his wallet from his pocket and gestures giving money to his wife.) She cooks your dinner, you have to give her deenero.
For any none Spanish (or Spanglish) speakers, "dinero" is Spanish for "money".
Six people, four languages, one syllable...an ebarrassing cock-up.
Friday, October 31, 2008
Sunday, October 12, 2008
Pushing my luck and my temper
WARNING This will probably be a long post, so make a cup of tea first.
There are issues with residency permits for Brits living in Spain. Basically the Spanish authorities stopped supplying European residents with photo ID cards a while ago and replaced them with non-photo certificates of residency. So what do I use as photo ID? Driving license? No. I have a Spanish "foreigner's" driving licence and the photo is only stapled to the card (cheap-skates) which makes it unusable as official ID. I can't reapply for a UK licence because I don't have an address there. I had two options, either carry my passport wherever I go or simply refuse to renew my residency card when it expired. The card expired two years ago and I've been using it constantly ever since as photo ID...and to all the unobservant shop assistants throughout Andalucia, I thank you from the heart of my bottom.
In the meantime I wrote to the British Ambassador and asked for an explanation as to why I was expected to carry my passport around (I know, I lied, it's bad and I deserve to be spanked) wherever I go. It transpires that the Spanish government are in fact playing by the rules (at this point Andaloo is rolling his eyes and doing that lemon sucking thing with his face) and doing the right thing. They (the Spanish government) are allowing European nationals resident in Spain to use the photo ID cards from their birth country in Spain instead of using a Spanish one. Problem solved? No. The UK don't have photo ID cards so we have nothing to use as a substitute other than our passports.
So, back to my situation. I decided not to renew my expired residency card and push my luck. I knew that one day I'd need to do something official and my luck would be up, but until then I'd keep on pushing. Well, my luck ran out. As I mentioned I've been doing some work. OK stop smirking, you've had this long intro so it's obvious what's coming...but I didn't. Yup, I got a call to say my residency had expired and unless I renew it they can't pay me. Now that's what I call motivation! So, on Friday I trotted off to the Big Smoke along with some new staff at school to be processed. I'm still angry and frustrated at the number of hoops I had to jump through to get this all new and improved certificate of residency, but that's another post, this one's already too long. The bottom line is I got it. What's interesting (or ironic) is, the others I went with all got photo ID cards. Why? Well, one is Canadian, two are Americans and the third is from Lebanon. It's absolutely BONKERS!
There are issues with residency permits for Brits living in Spain. Basically the Spanish authorities stopped supplying European residents with photo ID cards a while ago and replaced them with non-photo certificates of residency. So what do I use as photo ID? Driving license? No. I have a Spanish "foreigner's" driving licence and the photo is only stapled to the card (cheap-skates) which makes it unusable as official ID. I can't reapply for a UK licence because I don't have an address there. I had two options, either carry my passport wherever I go or simply refuse to renew my residency card when it expired. The card expired two years ago and I've been using it constantly ever since as photo ID...and to all the unobservant shop assistants throughout Andalucia, I thank you from the heart of my bottom.
In the meantime I wrote to the British Ambassador and asked for an explanation as to why I was expected to carry my passport around (I know, I lied, it's bad and I deserve to be spanked) wherever I go. It transpires that the Spanish government are in fact playing by the rules (at this point Andaloo is rolling his eyes and doing that lemon sucking thing with his face) and doing the right thing. They (the Spanish government) are allowing European nationals resident in Spain to use the photo ID cards from their birth country in Spain instead of using a Spanish one. Problem solved? No. The UK don't have photo ID cards so we have nothing to use as a substitute other than our passports.
So, back to my situation. I decided not to renew my expired residency card and push my luck. I knew that one day I'd need to do something official and my luck would be up, but until then I'd keep on pushing. Well, my luck ran out. As I mentioned I've been doing some work. OK stop smirking, you've had this long intro so it's obvious what's coming...but I didn't. Yup, I got a call to say my residency had expired and unless I renew it they can't pay me. Now that's what I call motivation! So, on Friday I trotted off to the Big Smoke along with some new staff at school to be processed. I'm still angry and frustrated at the number of hoops I had to jump through to get this all new and improved certificate of residency, but that's another post, this one's already too long. The bottom line is I got it. What's interesting (or ironic) is, the others I went with all got photo ID cards. Why? Well, one is Canadian, two are Americans and the third is from Lebanon. It's absolutely BONKERS!
Saturday, October 4, 2008
Limes under the sofa
So, here I am two weeks into my temporary job and feeling for the first time that I can come up for air. It's been difficult for lots of reasons, not least because I'm still doing my original job in the evenings too. I've found it hard to switch off, my mind has been racing and that's stopped me from sleeping, but over the last couple of evenings I've gone whole hours without thinking about work...a big step forward. When I just had the one job I was lucky enough that it afforded me time to sort out all the mundane house stuff as well. With both of us working full time we've had to make some changes, one of them being we had to do something about the cats being locked up all day, getting bored and trashing the house. (The first thing we do when we get home from work is re-make the bed that was perfectly made when we left the house that morning, collect the limes from under the sofa, put the chocolate wrappers back in the bin etc, etc...) We decided the answer was a simple catflap. Unfortunately the catflap idea coincided with our new neighbours arriving with a kitten, Jay. Jay? What a stupid name for a cat, so we renamed him Colin Con Cojones. Colin and Trevor have hit it off big time, I think Colin sees Trev as a bit of local totty and Trev just thinks colin is a big dolly to play with. The day the catflap was installed we got home expecting to find our cats happy and liberated. Wrong. What we found was our cats sitting outside looking through the catflap as if to say "what exactly am I supposed to do with this, and who's going to hold it open for me anyway?" Inside the house was Colin looking fat and happy on the sofa and two empty food bowls. Now...what was plan B?
Why the kids are spending so much time behind the science block
I stole this from a local blog to post here.
“Behind one of the buildings at a school in Pleasantville is a small machine, a number of dustbins, some plastic pipes and a dedicated science teacher.
This believe it or not is where the school produces its own diesel fuel. The scheme is the brainchild of science teacher Sean Johnson. He has set up the equipment so that the school’s pupils can learn about re-cycling in a very practical manner.
The used cooking oil from the school’s kitchens is collected and the converted in to biodiesel. It is then used to fuel the buses that transport the children to and from the school.
The process to change the cooking oil into fuel is not only a simple one but very cost effective too. Innovation advisor, Vicent Von Néree, says it costs 25 céntimos a litre, 80 per cent less than at a petrol station.
Sean Johnson has for some time wanted to set up a unit within the school dedicated to sustainable development. The pupils learn about the need to find alternative fuels, the re-cycling of oil and clean energy. He admits to having used the diesel in his own car for several months and says there are many advantages, not just the savings.”
“Behind one of the buildings at a school in Pleasantville is a small machine, a number of dustbins, some plastic pipes and a dedicated science teacher.
This believe it or not is where the school produces its own diesel fuel. The scheme is the brainchild of science teacher Sean Johnson. He has set up the equipment so that the school’s pupils can learn about re-cycling in a very practical manner.
The used cooking oil from the school’s kitchens is collected and the converted in to biodiesel. It is then used to fuel the buses that transport the children to and from the school.
The process to change the cooking oil into fuel is not only a simple one but very cost effective too. Innovation advisor, Vicent Von Néree, says it costs 25 céntimos a litre, 80 per cent less than at a petrol station.
Sean Johnson has for some time wanted to set up a unit within the school dedicated to sustainable development. The pupils learn about the need to find alternative fuels, the re-cycling of oil and clean energy. He admits to having used the diesel in his own car for several months and says there are many advantages, not just the savings.”
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